In my early adult years, I put my soul to sleep without realizing it. I began to compromise my values and integrity. I chose to give up my inner self for a meaningless life searching for instant gratification. I sensed I was doing something unworthy yet I feared the alternative. What if I wasn’t good enough? What if enlightenment was all a big hoo-ha over nothing?
For years I wondered through life, materialistically satisfying myself, yet there was something missing. A vital ingredient in my life was simply not there. I felt incomplete.
In my thirties I set out in search of this missing part of myself. When I went in search of this missing ingredient, I spent much of my time looking for the puzzle piece outside of myself and in others. Sometimes when I was with the right person I felt the calmness. But mostly I found it hard to achieve on my own.
Years later when I reconnected I realized what it was that was missing. I had become so engrossed with the everyday practical side of living that I had forgotten to nurture my soul. This is because I was not concentrating on my inner self and allowing myself to grow. I was looking for external support. The support was there, all I needed was to have confidence in myself to become spiritually guided.
Around the time I hit the big four O, I saw clearly that keeping a balance between the physical world and the spiritual can be as easy as you want it to be. There is no need to be extra pious or religious to achieve this enlightening moment in your life. When you do the right thing by connecting with your inner feelings – you know you are on your way to achieving your wishes.
After much deliberation, I came to the conclusion that it was o.k that I was single. I confronted my fears and became wiser nonetheless. All the things that were going wrong before my eyes did not feature well. I learned to relax in my own company, whereas before I wanted to fill my time up and keep so busy that I would not be able to reflect on the path I was going down.
When you reach that tranquil moment – really nothing in the world can touch you more than connecting with your inner true self and coming face to face with your spiritual side. It brings calmness and tranquility of a kind that you have never experienced. Once you reach this moment, you never want to go back to that mundane materialistic lifestyle again.
People describe this feeling as one of connection and expanding love for everything. This is a unique experience of feeling a sense of wholeness and oneness with the world.