“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
I used to struggle with the concept of being myself because I was brought up to be a polite, obedient, well-mannered and an all-round people pleaser. The issue was not that I didn’t want to be myself, but how could I be myself in a world which wanted to mould me and influence me into becoming someone I wasn’t?
Being yourself can sometimes be the hardest thing to do
All around you there are forces to try to shape you into someone you are not. There may be pressure from home, work, as well as social circles. So how can you be yourself in this evolving world that sometimes tries to crush your very soul? How can you leave an individual mark of your own without the fear of offending other people?
Well ask yourself this – how often do these other people take your feelings into account while they are living their life? How many times have you been hurt? You can’t please everyone – so you may as well please yourself because you have to live with yourself.
I am not implying that you should do whatever you want at the expense of hurting or humiliating other people. If you stick to your main core values, as a well-rounded individual you will not go out of your way to hurt or offend others. It is possible to achieve that all important balance in life.
Build up confidence within yourself if that is what you are lacking. Respect your values as you do other people’s values. You will find that other people will actually like and respect you for who you are. Polish up on your good qualities and allow them to shine. People will associate those qualities with you and your negative side will not be accentuated.
To begin with, get to know yourself. This includes your negative points as well as your strong points. Be at ease with your own company and others will be attracted to your wonderful qualities.
When you choose to copy someone else’s behaviour, for whatever reason, you are neglecting your true qualities. In this way you are not being yourselves. When you choose to be someone you are not, you will not attract the right type of people in your life. The people who suit you and could be good friends don’t know the real you and will never be able to connect with you because your true self is hidden away.
Good luck – you are a unique individual –so make the right choice by being yourself and keeping yourself that way. Choose to change because of your inner need to grow yourself, not simply to make others happy. If you are happy, others will be happy for you. If they are not happy for you, they are not worth your company.